No broccoli and an England win – back of the net

Wow. A double delight this week. Firstly I read that the current balmy weather and lack of rain means there might be a shortage of broccoli this summer.

Bring it on. That must be true – it was in the Daily Mail.

Secondly, England denied fans our regular crying-into-our-beer festival by winning a penalty shootout.

In case we need penalties again Sweden.....

Initially I was very upset. How dare the England football team deny me this ritual by actually winning a shootout.

Then the fog lifted and I realised exactly what the team had just done – won the World Cup.

Well, almost.

What is the most satisfying is the fact that the hand of God was on our side for once.

In my last post I mentioned that I wanted a sworn enemy a la Captain Poldark.

I said every man should have one and that ain’t right.

I am pleased to say I was flooded with applications – and here it is.

“May I apply for the position of sworn enemy please? Apart from the fact you an Arse fan I now learn that you are cruel to wildlife too. I feel I am well qualified for this position as I have had plenty of practice both commercially and more recently with relations.

Incidentally, I had three squirrels out on the patio and one of them briefly came into the kitchen............twice! I have no problem with them on the roof and in the front garden but not on the patio. I'm thinking of putting a sign up rather than the rather drastic measures you appear to be employing.”